Time has definitely passed me by.
It took some time before I realized that Matthew is now in secondary school. Or did it take some time before I accepted the fact that Matthew is now in secondary school? It just doesn’t feel like it at home. I’m not complaining though. Because at home, he still gives us hugs and kisses. He still asks us to open jars, wrap his books and find his spectacles. His room is still always a mess and his hair is still mostly unkempt. He still forgets everything and he still does not have a care in the world. He did grow up a bit in some way. It is no longer milestones but you could still say that the changes are mild improvements. He no longer wants us to give him baths for one thing (although I still need to drag him out of bed in the morning). He has his own choices when it comes to clothing him (preferring -ehem- to be comfortable at the expense of looking like a rag doll). He eats most of his food now if he likes it (it still takes him an hour to do so). And other little changes here and there.
I keep having to remind myself that he is twelve now. A pre-teen. And probably the start of even more headaches and heartaches. Sometimes I think about asking my parents how I was like when I was twelve, but they will probably only say that “I had been a handful but a good kid nonetheless”. It’s like those random psychology tests that you get asked on Facebook. The results are always answers so vague that you think that you already knew them all along. To be honest, Matthew does not really like being compared to anyone, including me. From time to time he would point out things that he has been doing that is similar to what we have done before (based on stories that we have already shared). But directly comparing what he is doing to others is a big no-no. What I’m afraid of though, is if he becomes more of a handful than I had been when I was his age.
I don’t want to think about the negatives because there will always be bad stuff with the good stuff. After all, balance is the key. It is a bit difficult writing about life only when there is absolute good in it. Because honestly, everybody has their good days and their bad days. There may come a change in the way this blog moves forward from here on in. I will still try and balance writing about things that can be discussed and of course keep things that are private, well, private. We’ll see how things go along this year and the coming years. Fingers crossed.